.me being me.

28.2.06

ok.... i was in a ultra down mood the previous time when i blogged. but now everything's ok at work already. i talked to my boss, clarified with him my schedule, and he understands now that i have my own commitments. so i suppose work is pretty normal right now although he wants me to go back on saturdays every week instead of the alternate week that my HR manager told me in the first place. hais. but nvm lah, go back then go back lor. kinda expected actually.

hhhmmm...enough of work. its crazy reading my own blog about work work work n more work. nuts.

anyways i'm fine already...i really do appreciate all your concerns, you know who you areeee, thanks sweethearts =))

thanks jieying, fuzzy and all who offered to accompany me for lunch =))) that made lunch hours worth looking forward to =))

anyways, IVP is coming. i'm dead. my opponent is a monster. her pain threshold is damn high. i dont hope much to win, but of course my aim is to win her lah, and if i do, i'd get the bronze!! but given the timeframe for me to impove my skills, i dont think i'll be able to make it pass her, unless i suddenly get enlightened in tkd, which is highly unlikely so.

so for now, i'll train as hard as i can, so i wont get trashed too badly like i did the previous time during the friendly match by her. wish me lucks. so till then. its back to work. and oh, exam results should be released soon too. *shudders*

good luck to kimmy for your A lvl results kk!!!

i really do miss those days in school with jieying, jiajia, huimin, shihui, lishi and zhihong. i had a great night monkeying with u all again on friday =)) ARGH. i wished attachment would end soon so we can get back to school together again.. =))

.ruffles off.

26.2.06

aiyah i feel like life is so horrible now. i'm feeling so horrible because i'm always torn between attachment and my own commitments and plans because my supervisor thinks that i should concentrate fully on my attachment and not have any other commitments. wth i'm still a student ok. i live a student's life and attachment is part of my life as a student.

it was on thurs that he told me i had to go for a meeting on fri which starts at 6.30pm and would last for at least 2 hrs. my usual office hours are from 9am to 5.30pm. i dont understand why he can't arrange the meeting during office hours lor. hais. nvm. actually i wanted to train tkd that day coz weigh in is on sat and there was a mini tkd meeting after training, so i told him i can't go for the meeting, then he didnt looked happy lah!!! then on fri he asked again if i really cant make it for the meeting. i thought about it and told him i could stay till 8pm, coz i was thinking i'll take a cab down to school and at least train a little. that day i structured out the whole innerweb design for him, did some filing for the accountant, became kopi-aunty when 4 potential big customers came, so i had to serve them coffee. the bloody instant coffee mix didnt have sugar and i havent used the pantry before so i didnt know where to get what. but thank god there was the HR manager, she helped me get sugar. but anyways back to topic, i've always looked forward to 5.30pm when i can pack up and get away from the office, but that day i had to stay so i was feeling damn miserable when it was 5.30pm. then about 6pm my boss as me go tapao mac for him, so i waked to bugis. then when i came back he told me i didnt have to stay for the meeting since i had something on, but i have to go back on sat for some other meeting. i was happy for a moment then sian diaos again coz weigh in is on sat!!!!! this time its either i go for weigh in or the meeting. i definitely have to choose weigh in what?!?!! moreover he last minute then tell me again. and on top of that i wasnt even supposed to work on that saturday coz the HR manager told me i only have to work alternate weeks and since i already went back for work last week, i didnt worry about the weigh in. then i told him i can't go again, and can see he wanna kill me already lah, but i can't help it what!! hais. then he said i shouldnt have other commitments on the 5 and a half working days. oh god i really dont know what to say lor.

attachment is bad enough when its already so lonely. sometimes when i hear certain songs like bu de bu ai, it brings back memories of those days in school with jieying shihui huimin and the rest, i really wanna cry in the office lor. those few days during lunch was the loneliest days in my life ever. when i met shihui they all during dinner i wanna cry already. i hate it lah. i hate the loneliness. i hate being alone. i hate the foreign place. sometimes i feel damn small, damn lonely lah. especially when i walk through bugis street alone after work, and everyone is like bustling around me, i feel damn lost and i get quite scared sometimes then i feel like crying again. i know it sounds damn stupid lah. but i know i'm not happy at all, the feeling is damn miserable. i hate it lor. to top it off, i do all the so called 'sai kangs' at work. then at the end of the day i would feel so exhausted and everyday at 5.30pm all i want is just to see some familar face so i wont feel so upset. tts y i meet jieying and shihui nearly almost everyday to keep me sane.

i just saw the name list for ivp. hais. damn scared. my left instep and ankle still hurts abit. i dont wanna fight already laaaah. i only want attachment to end soon. 9 more weeks to go. sobs. =(((((((((((

.ruffles off.

23.2.06

argggh. life's so different now.

i miss school. the people i mean. i realised i've grown attached to nyp in one way or another. its the people lahs.

anyways, work sucks. so many things to do. going nutttty. shd i do OT or not?? if i dont, my grades would probably be affected. if i do, i'll become siao. the thing is, we're not supposed to do OT, but if the co. wants us to, we'll have to. NOT FAIR! =((

anyways, met kimmy at mc today after piano =))

heheees. love her to bits. 8 years. we've known each other for half our lives already. hahahaaa. muahs~

hhmmm. so many things to do and attachment has already taken up 80% of my time. I HAVE NO TIME FOR MY OWN STUFFS!!! I NEED MORE TIME!!!!!!! sighs.

2.5 months. 9 more weeks. pray hard it'll pass quickly and hope i'll get through this with NO PROBLEM =))

till then................ sadded.

.ruffles off.

18.2.06

yay!! 1 week down! lolx. 10 weeks left. i'll get through it. i will HAVE TO. provided i dont fail any papers lah. CHOY.

finally my supervisor had time to brief me through my job scope for the 11 weeks. i think its gonna be a long and tedious 10 weeks from now on. i'll be assisting him w marketing and admin stuffs. i'll need some help from all the IT wizzez coz he wants me to use some microsoft portal thingy to maintain the marketing side of the webby. and whoever knows me, shd know that me n IT dont mix well. so i'm quite dead. sighs. and i have to come up with some marketing plans, which i'm damn scared i'll come up with the wrong stuffs lah. coz marketing projects used to be done in groups. hahaaa. now i have to do it alone. he told me marketers cant stop thinking so i have to keep thinking and come up with new ideas all the time. hais. i seriously dont know if i can keep up with him. he's quite you know, 'snap fingers' type.

anyways, they thought i was 15. hahahaa. they dont really talk to me, but when they do, they'll say i heard you blah blah blah. yeah heard. why dont you ask me in the face. i'll tell ya.

anyways, enough of work. i've been working since mon. i still needa work tmr!!!! but at mc lah. sianed. but anyways i went shopping w jiajia n jieying today. hahaaa. was fun!! =))

anyways, i know i've changed. lol. a lot. but people change when they grow rite?!? so it just means i've been growing. lolx. the way things are at this moment. my life. i shd b thankful. theres just so much going on right now in every aspect of my life. so many choices laid out, sometimes i really dont know what i want. i act according to my mood, so what i want changes all the time i suppose. i'm just who i am, the things i do, the way that i am! hahaaa. oh wells, there are ups and downs to everything.

listened to 'God will make a way' on the train just now after jieying alighted the train and i set it on repeat mode all the way till home. lolx. i havent heard tt song for a damn long time already for some reasons.

and my ankle is hurting again. sighs. i wonder when it'll actually heal. maybe i shd go see a sensei?? hahaaa. but scared pain sia. lol. and i'm not gonna let my parents know coz if they do, they're gonna make alot of noise.

.ruffles off.

15.2.06

attachment started 3 days ago but it feels like i've been on attachment for months. its damn lonely lah. especiall during lunch hours. machiam like wandering ghost like that. I HATE HAVING LUNCH ALONE!!!! =(( i was damn miserable on the first day lor. sobs. but i'm starting to get used to this newfound 'independence'. but i HATE IT. hais. so would any kind souls come look for me at fortune city during lunch hours to have lunch w me?? hais. shit the lonliness thingy. hate it like siao. and one more thing that makes it bad is i kept getting lost on the way to work. like whatever laaaah! =(((((( horrible.

hais. basically work is rather ok lah. its pretty mundane and routined. was doing quite alot of accounts stuffs which is like super duper ultra boring. and urgh i gotta check out some IT, website stuffs which my supervisor expects me to maintain lah?!!? sharepoint portal. like ermm...??? and some other marketing stuffs which i hope i wont screw up. uh oh. its only the 3rd day. still 10.5 more weeks to go. sighs.

but on the brighter side of things. i feel less miserable each time i go back to work coz maybe i'm getting to know the enviroment better, getting used to it, knowing the people better as well. they're nice but super duper busy pple. but oh wells, i'm starting to speak to them more, so hais, i hope i would be able to fit in soon!!! but i still dread lunch hours tho coz everyone is like so busy, nobody has the time take a break and go lunch w me but it doesnt really matter coz i dont really know them well yet anyways.

right now, i just live each day as it passes. living a dull and rountined lifestyle. sighs. anybody wanna spice up my life a little more???

HO QIAN HUI. meet me pls.

oh yes. hope everyone had a happy valentines.
and sorry kimmy. attachment laaaaaahhh. meet u soon kkk!!!! on weekends =))

.ruffles off.

9.2.06

its 9 feb already. just one more paper to go for tomorrow =))

poly life passes so quickly, i'll be off for attachment in 3 more days time, which means that i'll be in year 3 already!!! can't believe it man.

and that would mean that the current year threes are also graduating soon. sadded. nvm. everyone has to move on what right??

hhmmm... i foresee a very lonely and hectic 2 months ahead. no ee gong clan for company everyday. i hope i dont have to work on saturdays too else i'll be working everyday from mon to sun. totally sianed. i feel i have no life already. i wanna meet ee gong clan, i wanna go tkd, i wanna meet qtmk, i wanna go out!! i wanna shop!! i wanna slaccccckkkk. lolx. errrhh.. i'm actually slacking now lah. retail and travel tomorrow in e-plaza. hahaa. and i left my ring in the exam hall today. forget it. i keep losing rings. dont wanna wear already.

i really really really do cherish all the times when my ee gong clan gets together. which is like everyday???? we can just stand anywhere, go anywhere, be at any place and can still play, fool around, smack, whack, suan, disturb and just talk nonstop. i can't believe it lor. they've like become pple i cant do without. i can say TEP can bonded us closer. sighsss. its gonna be a long 2 months =))

tomorrow tomorrow... we're gonna have fun okk??? our last last time to relax and enjoy before attachment starts!!

sighs. actually theres tkd camp tomorrow and saturday. but i suppose i can only choose one. i'll go for tkd on sat and skip tomorrow's training. and dont start nagging abt going for trainings to me. i know what to do, i manage my own time. i have a thousand and one things to do. and tkd is one of them, so dont worry i'll not be responsible and not heed my own advice about turning up for trainings. i'm just typing all these thoughts here just in case any buggers irritates me about my schedule management.

.ruffles off.

4.2.06

exams.attachments.exams.attachments.exams.attachments.

oh noooo.

i know where i'm attached to already.

sighsssss. i can feel the loneliness already.

exaaammmsss.
6th- biz finance
7th- marketing
8th- efma
9th- biz law
10th- retail n travel
10th n 11th- ivp training camp (i dont really feel like going hahaaa)
12th- teach piano
13th- attachment starts!!!

WHY NO BREAK!?!?!?

sianed. CNY is not good this year. but i dont really care. lolx. i just wanna get poly over and done with quickly.

anyways, to pple out there who ride bikes.
becareful when you're out on the roads and wear your helmets properly, it could be your lifesaver. if possible, dont ride a bike at all.

.ruffles off.